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Thanksgiving Day is a reminder of how we should think and act every day.
Because gratitude is the core of good living.
Have you ever heard the saying, "I was complaining about having no shoes until I met the man with no feet." I remember that every day. When we stop focusing on what we don't have, and feel grateful for what we do have, our moods and outlooks do a 180-degree turn into a happier place.
With Michigan's economy lagging behind the rest of the nation, and unemployment, the Big Three crisis, and all the other worrisome headlines, it's easy to obsess about lack.
But today, as we celebrate Thanksgiving amidst an abundance of family, friends and delicious food, use this as a dress rehearsal for tomorrow and every day to come.
Say Thank You for your life, your health, your food, your family and friends, even the hot shower you enjoyed this morning. I guarantee, feeling thankful for what you have is the most powerful way to Find Your Daily Bliss.
Celebrate! And have the Happiest Thanksgiving!
Every time I hear the word Recession, I think about the early 90s when the same word headlined every news report. It was scary.
But then economic boom times followed under President Clinton.
"Look to history," says National Urban League President Marc Morial, who recently addressed the Detroit Economic Club, "and you'll see that America is so resilient, we will find a silver lining and get through this. History shows that whatever the problem is, we can rise above it and enjoy better days."
That is so comforting. Daily news reports inspire me to think back on where America's been... wars, the Depression, the KKK era, slavery, colonial days. All that reminds me how far we've come. And how confident we should be that better days lay ahead.
So if times feel tough, think about scary times in history that America pulled through to become bigger and better. So Find Your Daily Bliss by making the best of today, confident that better days ahead will sparkle even brighter.
The recession...
Unemployment...
The Big Three Bail-Out...
It's so easy to spiral down into a negative state of mind, or downright panic.
Th first time I saw black and white video of Depression-Era bread lines on a national news report about the economy, my immediate response was Click! But we can't tune out the news. We have to know what's going on in the world.
So I turned it back on and watched. Rather than panic, though, I remembered the fears I had back in 1991, when the Recession struck and my classmates in Journalism school were fretful about finding jobs. I worked hard, pursued my goals, and landed an awesome internship-turned-job at the Detroit News as a reporter.
Writing and reporting--that was my Bliss. I followed it, worked hard at it, and was lucky enough to get a great job right out of school, in my hometown.
The bad news? My father had died while I was away at school, so the time was bittersweet.
My point? Focus on what you love, and good things will come to you. Unemployed or laid off? Now's the time to find your true calling, to pursue something that you enjoy so much, you'd do it for free. Yesterday I heard Dr. Michael Beckwith of The Secret say when you're following your life's passion, money becomes your shadow. It follows you.
So take the negative news in stride. Immerse in something that makes you happy. And when you Find Your Daily Bliss, you will be abundantly rewarded.
When I read the musician Kanye West's comment in a popular magazine that he prefers to date exotic-looking, mixed-race female "mutts" and cast them in his videos—I was outraged. The word mutt sounds so dirty, so inferior. It's the opposite, in the dog world, of pedigreed. You know, the primped and groomed kind of expensive, pure-blood dog that wins blue ribbons.
But when I heard that President Elect Barack Obama said he wanted to get his daughters a puppy from a shelter, specifically "a mutt like me" — I took the comment quite differently. Especialy when I read a news article that said his comment — which drew laughter — epitomized his ability to take a heavy-duty subject like race and lighten it into palatable subject matter for life-changing conversations.
Whatever it takes. I just caution that a word that's so loaded with meaning can be used, by the malicious-minded, against us.
Biracial and multiracial are the terms du jour that make mixed-race people feel affirmed and valued. Those are the contemporary words that should be used as America's new conversation on race evolves. Meanwhile, we should banish the slave-era word mulatto — which comes from mule, the sterile cross between a horse and a donkey. It's also a life partner with the word tragic. The tragic mulatto stereotype, also rooted in slavery, cast an image of mixed-race folks as confused, alienated, rejected by both side.
Now every side is embracing this triumphant man named Barack Obama.
Because, thankfully, the world has changed. Race relations have changed. Perceptions have changed. And the conversation has changed.
In the big picture, any dialogue is progress. Sometimes we can be so terrified of offending someone, that we opt out of the race conversation altogether. That's dangerous.
Let's be brave in our new world. And continue to change for the better.
As a child in Detroit in the 1960s, Errol Jones quit school and jumped on a fast track to trouble. Fortunately, his grandfather intervened and sent him to boarding school. But — still seduced by the streets — he dropped out three times before finally earning his diploma.
“I look at my life as a miracle,” says Jones, a PhD candidate and CEO of The Errol Jones Group. “And my life has come full circle. That inspires me to help create miracles for others.”
And so, as an educator and entrepreneur, the 50-year-old, married father of two grown sons is on a mission to save young people from the perils of dropping-out, becoming delinquent, and believing the hype of thug life that’s glamorized in the mesmerizing bling of music and videos.
“A lot of folks don’t
survive the kinds of things I went through," says Jones, an alternative school teacher whose father died when he was 10. "As an African American, I look at the experiences
and benefits I’ve had and I see that it’s time to give back to my
community.”
Jones is embarking on this mission armed with an MBA in eBusiness, earned last year, that he's using to create Internet-based programs that teach entrepreneurial skills to young people. He has a master’s degree in Education Curriculum and Instruction in
1987, bolstered by a bachelor’s degree in Ministerial Studies in 1982 —
both from Loma Linda University in California. Jones channels his gratitude for getting off the fast track to trouble — into helping young people,
especially African American youth.
“I’m concerned about
what I see in our community. I see a lot of young African American
males in particular, and people reciting what I call ‘the black
facts:’ prison population numbers, drop out rates, low economic
achievement, limited representation in college, and the list goes on.”
Jones says too many people use “the black facts” to endorse a sense of
hopelessness for black youth. He’s on a mission to change that by starting a variety of
programs that teach young people how to build businesses, earn money and become leaders. With internet marketing and word of mouth promotions, Jones believes he can help young people find their daily bliss in education and entrepreneurship.
“I’m coming along with a solution!”
The bail-out... the roller-coaster stock market... all the bad news about the economy...
It's enough to send anyone into a panic.
But wait... you can fend off the frantic feelings about the economy by doing things throughout the day that make you smile, relax or laugh.
I do this everyday... and it keeps me upbeat.
Even better — you can do a lot of things to Find Your Daily Bliss — that are FREE!
Here are some examples. I hope they brighten your day:
• Lace up your gym shoes and take a walk or a run, and marvel at the reds, oranges and yellows of the changing leaves.
• Head to the RiverWalk behind the GM Building downtown... the water, the city skylines, and the people watching are phenomenal.
• Stroll through Eastern Market on a Saturday; behold the bounty of the Michigan harvests, the interesting people, the jammin' karaoke at Bert's on Russell Street.
• MAKE some time to indulge your favorite activity—scrapbooking, rollerblading, tinkering with cars, volunteering at a hospital.
• Write down 10 things that you're grateful for today (my list always includes a warm, safe place to sleep--you can be real basic with things we take for granted that are, sadly, luxuries for too many people around the world).
• If you're stressed and unhappy with your situation today, write out a full page describing your dream life, and do one thing today that can help you get there (For example, if you want to start a business, start researching locations, product supply, a marketing plan. Want to lose weight? Go shopping for healthy fare).
If all else fails, remember, things could always be worse, and this too, shall pass.
If something horrible happened to you, would you be able to talk about it — on national radio and in auditoriums full of people?
What if what happened was something scary and secret?
And you were only five years old when it started...
For Stephanie L. Jones, talking about the sexual abuse that she endured for seven years — from age five to twelve — is something that has become her mission in life.
This super-sensitive subject is her passion and her purpose in life — so that she can help other victims — and spare other little girls and boys from experiencing the trauma that she has endured.
This mission takes the form of her book, The Enemy Between My Legs. In it, she shares her gripping story of how her mother took in boarders, strangers, who abused her body. The book's striking brown cover says, "I promised not to tell a soul."
Apparently, countless other young women have made that same promise to their abusers, Stephanie says. She recently spoke on this subject at a Detroit high school, she explains, and dozens of girls burst into tears, fled the auditorium, and approached her to share their own stories of molestation.
"Research shows that one in every three females and one in every five males is the victim of some kind of sexual abuse," Stephanie says while presenting an hour-long workshop amidst the beautiful lakeside scenery of historic Idlewild, Michigan. "Most sexual abuse occurs at the hands of family members. There's a lot of shame and denial. And the abuse can cause girls and boys to become promiscuous later in life because their bodies still want the stimulation, even after the abuse stops."
The problem, says Stephanie, who has been a guest on Michael Baisden's national radio show, is that many teens do not make the connection between their abuse and their promiscuity — until they find themselves in a serious relationship. Suddenly, she says, the past violation of their emotional, physical and spiritual selves can make it difficult or impossible to share deep intimacy in a committed relationship or marriage.
Another problem, she says, is that many victims repeat their behavior by sexually abusing other children and teens in their own families.
Saving people from the fear and violation and damage that results from sexual abuse, Stephanie says, keeps her talking and writing about this subject for schools, churches, conferences, companies and the media.
Her boundless courage, honesty and comfort in talking about such delicate matters captivates her audiences, many times with her devoted husband Robert at her side.
"I know what it feels like to suffer in silence," she writes on her website, www.stephanieljones.com. "I want to help the brokenhearted and those broken in spirit, not just the victims, but the offender and the entire family. Everyone is affected when a child is molested by another family member."
The Detroit native, who left corporate America to embark on her quest to help victims of sexual abuse, has received the Kiwanis International Lee
Harden Take Time to Care Award.
At the heart of her mission is to educate parents about the warning signs of sexual abuse — and the dangers lurking within one's own family — to protect girls and boys.
By using her own tragedy to educate and protect others, Stephanie L. Jones is providing a meaningful and healing service to the world. Hearing her speak about the graphic details of sexual abuse is chilling. But her openness and genuine concern for helping others is awe-inspiring. She is an excellent example of a Metro Detroiter who's transforming tragedy into triumph, to make the world a better place.
It's a tragic day for our city. Today as I jogged toward one of our city's most sparkling gems — The RiverWalk — I sprinted past a small army of TV news trucks in front of Campus Martius and the Coleman A. Young Municipal Center.
The gorgeous summer day, with the sunshine blazing from a bright blue sky, showed no hint of the stormcloud thundering through our city — and reverberating around the world.
Sadly, we are a global spectacle. For too many reasons, the world is looking down at the shocking state of affairs in the Motor City.
The shock of today's news made me cry — twice. First, this morning, when our mayor was led from court to detention. Then during the 5 o'clock news, when I heard the whole saga over again. I cried because I love Detroit. I celebrate our amazing progress every time I watch my son play in the RiverWalk fountain with other children. I feel proud when I bike past Ford Field, Comerica Park and the Book Cadillac. I love to look out the window of my downtown home and see cranes creating new silhouettes against the skyline. And as a creative person, it's exciting to feel part of the Renaissance.
But today...
We need some Bliss! Our city is already reeling from unemployment, crime, foreclosures and the on-going mayor's scandal. Now, this.
It's really important to Find Your Daily Bliss by doing something that makes you feel good. Even for just a few minutes. Something that relieves the overwhelming range of emotions that might be wrenched up by today's news. Whether you feel sad or angry or vindicated or glad, this heavy-duty downer for our entire region calls for some mood-boosters!
So just like I took a run today to counteract the bad news with a great burst of endorphins, I urge you to make a commitment to enjoy some Bliss. Indulge in a great meal. Visit with friends. Immerse in a satisfying hobby. Read an awesome book. Laugh with children. Savor some ice cream. Hit the gym! Watch a funny movie.
Then reach out and invite a friend, a colleague, a neighbor to join you. Right now, the best remedy for all this bad news is to enjoy some Bliss — and share it!
Jacquelyn Rochell’s bliss glows around her like a sunburst. When she speaks and smiles and shares personal testimonies about her life’s struggles, the triumphant sparkle in her eyes makes you feel invigorated to make all your dreams come true. You’d never guess this West Bloomfield motivator was once homeless, sleeping in her car with her four children. Or that she has survived rape and domestic abuse. Or that once, she was ready to just plain give up on life.No, Jacquelyn exudes such positive energy and eloquent testimonials about overcoming adversity that you feel like you’ve just met your new best friend.That’s how I felt last night, when Jacquelyn and I joined three other exuberant entrepreneurs at Detroit’s Union Street restaurant. We’re planning a fantabulous event this fall — to inspire people to seize their inner power to make their dreams come true in love, career, health and leisure. And 43-year-old Jacquelyn is doing just that. Several years ago, she left a bad marriage in her hometown of Mobile, Alabama. She brought her four kids to Detroit to start a new life. With little money, they slept in her car. She applied for welfare, but hated the feeling of getting a hand-out from the government. With strong faith and memories of friends, family and teachers always encouraging her to reach for the stars, Jacquelyn stayed positive—and innovative. For example, she parlayed a job at a fabrics store into a lucrative home-based business as a seamstress making dresses for proms and weddings. In a short time, she had a house for her kids, and a conversion van that she drove home to visit Alabama.“When I rolled up in that,” she says with a million-watt smile, “everybody was like, ‘Jacquelyn hasn’t been gone a year and look at her now!’”Teaching political science at Wayne County Community College District, running a travel agency, and writing books such as Move Beyond the Colored Line, Jacquelyn is finding her bliss — and serving as an awesome example of how we can do that, too!You can learn more about Jacquelyn at www.myspace.com/ jacquelynrochell.
When I first met Anne Eames at a local Romance Writers of America meeting, she was talking about how sultry actress Sharon Stone was reviewing one of her books to possibly make a movie about it.Next thing I heard, Anne and her husband were moving to South Africa to work as missionaries!First, the now-63-year-old grandmother from Waterford was finding her bliss as the author of steamy stories for Harlequin. But suddenly her life purpose and passion shifted to helping others live a better life in a poverty- and AIDS-plagued section of the world — far, far away from Metro Detroit. It all started when she and Bill, 62, took a two-week trip to South Africa through Kensington Community Church in Troy.“I came away thinking how happy and content the very poorest of poor were, how they sang and smiled and laughed at the smallest things,” Anne says. “When we got home… we realized how excessive we lived… and how our money could be spent better on what really matters. This started a restlessness in us that continued through the next four years and two return visits to South Africa… it was time to take a leap of faith and act.”So they did, on Labor Day, 2004. Now they’re helping people in Cape Town who are poor and living with HIV and AIDS. Anne and Bill run African Hope Crafts, where men and women create jewelry that they sell worldwide on a website. Profits from the necklaces, bracelets and other items help support the South Africans’ families and medical needs. You can visit their online jewelry site at http://www.africanhopecrafts.org/Crafts/Crafts.html>
From romance writer to missionary, Anne has followed her heart and her calling around the globe.
So do they miss Metro Detroit? Well, they come home every Christmas to visit with their four grown children and six grandkids. And she says they miss Home Depot, Office Max and football, along with Thanksgiving.
But Bill and Anne are loving life — by finding their bliss in helping others to live better lives.
You can email Anne and Bill at baeames@iafrica.com.
When Janaya Black got pregnant as a teenager, loved ones told her to kiss her dreams goodbye. Compelled to leave her father’s Westland home and drop out of Eastern Michigan University, she didn’t even know if her boyfriend would want the baby — or her. But Janaya had big dreams. And the 18-year-old would let nothing stop her. So she took a telemarketing job, selling wallpaper and blinds to support herself. Fortunately, her boyfriend proposed and they married. With a healthy baby boy, DeShawndre, she worked in the mortgage industry for 10 years—and accomplished Dream #1: writing her first novel, The Breaking Point.After that, her husband played a small role in Eminem’s 8 Mile, and the couple fell in love with movie-making. So they immersed in the local film community, and Janaya and Rockey made a trailer in 2004 for a movie based on her book. Along the way, they had a daughter, now 5-year-old MaKinlee. And Janaya wrote a second novel, As Told By The Other Woman, and a third book, Beautiful Rage: The Break of Dawn.Then came Dream #2: she began writing for The Front Page, ultimately becoming assistant editor.Now she’s about to unveil Dream #3: a feature film! Till Death will premiere on August 1st at the Charles H. Wright Museum of African American History in Detroit. Produced by her film company, Black-Smith Enterprises, and filmed in Detroit, the drama is part of a three-day film festival at the Museum and the Boll Family YMCA. Trinity Film Coalition, which Janaya and her husband founded with
Marshalle Montgomery, is sponsoring the free festival.Janaya says that overcoming the odds to live her dream as a mother, wife, novelist, journalist and filmmaker is absolute Bliss. “It’s the best feeling in the world, doing what you love to do,” says the 31-year-old Westland resident who’s been happily married for a dozen years. Her advice to teen mothers who fear they’ll never succeed? “If you step out on faith and go after what you want in life, you set your feet on that path and nobody can deter you. The only obstacle in life is always you, and what you’re willing to do. Don’t let anything stop you.”You can learn more about Janaya and contact her at her website www.black-smithenterprises.com.
Have you ever met someone who inspired you to re-think life, love and your pursuit of happiness?
These are the folks I'm showcasing here on The Bliss Report. Because men, women and children who triumph over tragedy can inspire us to enjoy life to the fullest. I was doing that recently in Starbucks. In a big velvet chair, I was sipping peppermint tea and loving the Oprah book Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert.
"Mind if I join you?" A male voice, distorted by cerebral palsy, made me glance up. Controlling his limbs to walk, he sat facing me as an employee placed his iced coffee on the table.
Then, Eric Toelle struggled against facial muscle spasms to tell his story. Born 33 years ago, the umbilical cord cinched his neck and robbed his arms, legs and mouth of normal function.
"I feel like I'm in prison," he said, describing taunts as a child and his wish for romantic love now, "and my only crime was being born."
Tears stung my eyes. His story could be any of ours, or our children's. Think about the anxieties we face every day—at school, at work, in relationships. Now imagine Eric's immense courage to proceed with his head and his hope held high. Would you give up? Would you lock yourself in your home?
Amazingly, despite rejection, alienation and torment that others inflict upon him, Eric ventures into the world — as a senior history major at Wayne State University. As a man approaching a woman in the coffee shop. And as a member of his church, where he draws strength every Sunday. And, he said:
"I'm writing a book. I want to tell my story so other kids don't get cruelly teased like I was."
My Barefoot Life will encourage people to follow their spirit to enjoy happiness. He does that through personal interaction as opposed to text messages, emails and phone calls. The St. Clair Shores resident also loves reading newspapers and doing the crossword puzzle over coffee.
Was it random that he "just happened" to pick me out of all the folks
in the coffee shop? Me, who had just conducted my popular "How to
Write a Book and Get Published" workshop? Me, who has written 11
books?
Call it what you want. But call Eric an everyday hero. He's an example to ditch the bad news in our lives—and celebrate friendships, earn an education, tell our stories to help others. Please share your stories here at The Bliss Report. Your words and wisdom can brighten someone else's day!
Add a Story the Bliss Report
Apr 17, 2008 | 12:16 PM PST
Category:
News
War. Crime. City Council chaos. The mayor’s sex & text scandal. Unemployment… foreclosures… gas prices… Enough! We have to know what’s happening in our world… but with so much bad news… We need some Bliss! So it’s time to take the advice of American writer Joseph Campbell: “Follow your bliss!” I do that, every day. Bliss is the mental parachute that saves me from the slimy pit of worry, sadness and fear that I call The Abyss. I’ve spent too much time there — thanks to an ugly divorce… a lifetime struggle with weight… and racial identity chaos. Just a few years ago, I was so sad and scared, I ended up in the ER with chest pains. “What does not kill me,” wrote the French philosopher Nietzsche in 1888, “makes me stronger.” That’s me. Stronger. Living passionately. And following my Bliss every day. It feels so great — I want to share it with you!
In The Bliss Report, right here at MyFoxDetroit.com. On my blog and in video reports, I’ll introduce you to awesome people who are turning tragedy into triumph. By following their own Bliss, they’re uplifting and inspiring others, too. Like the woman who creates beautiful jewelry to soothe the sadness of losing her mother, sister and father in quick succession. She transforms her tears into crystal earrings, necklaces and bracelets that make people smile. Also in The Bliss Report, you’ll meet a woman who slayed her personal demons and finds happiness in helping people feng shui their homes and offices into serene sanctuaries.
The Bliss Report is your place for positive news! So please tell me how you — and people you know —are overcoming obstacles to make a positive impact on our world. E-mail me here (Click Here) to share your stories or add your stories to this blog. Then I can write about you… or even do a video Bliss Report about your story.
Meanwhile, I’m a former Fox 2 newswriter and a bestselling author. A Michigan native and downtown Detroiter, I’m an exercise and healthy eating enthusiast—after celebrating 100-pound weight loss on Oprah! As an expert on interracial families and biracial people, I was a guest on Montel with my first book, White Chocolate.
And on my website, ElizabethAtkins.com, I blog about life and love at TheBlissReport. There,
you might read how my pursuit of happiness helps me celebrate the gift
of motherhood with my super-cool, intelligent 10-year-old son. Or how I cherish my friends and family. Or how my Bliss attracted The Man of My Dreams, who restored my faith in love. Or how I’m working on really cool writing projects. And how The Tyra Banks Show recently flew me to New York to talk about an article that I wrote for a national magazine. Despite all of this, life ain’t perfect. But that’s the point. I combat the negative with lots of positive. It takes work. But it works. And I want to show you how. So welcome to The Bliss Report. Write me a post. Share an email or blog about yourself or an amazing person you know. And together we can celebrate some good news!
